Thinking 'bout the good old days
We took the boys out of school today (don't worry, I'm an educational psychologist), and went to Six Flags instead. Paul is always in my mind, but Six Flags magnifies my memories of him. I enjoy retracing his steps there. Recalling where he found money, what rides he enjoyed most, etc. I hear other kids laughing, and it reminds me of Paul. I'll never forget his riding the rollercoasters over and over again. Today we were about to hop on one of Paul's favorite rides when I noticed that the last passenger had thrown up all over the place. We all grossed out, but in my mind I could just hear Paul cackling and saying something sarcastic like..."hey, Dad...why don't you just sit in it!" Where did he get that sick sense of humor? I thought of Paul as Jack stretched under a fence to capture a dime. Others were just out of reach. Paul would have obsessed over those until he made me put gum on the end of a stick in order to McGyver the coins through the fence.
Lately, a lot of relapsed NB kids I follow have died, several have disease progression, and some close friends are dealing with yearly anniversaries of their childs' deaths. It's all so hard to understand when you consider the amount of suffering these kids and families go through; discouraging too. It reminds me of some U2 lyrics:
The more you see the less you know
The less you find out as you go
I knew much more then than I do now
All I know for sure is how much I miss Paul.
posted by Saxon Report at 7:59 PM
5 Comments:
Hey man. I think about your sweet boy every day; when I walk past your family picture in our living room, or when I hear "puke" jokes from my 6 year old. I'm glad you guys still go to Six Flags, and I'm glad you still share stories about your sweet boy. We all still love and miss him! xo Janet
We haven't forgotten, Terrill. We're still praying for you guys. Keep truckin'.
I'm also still praying that I will catch a bass like that some day. With my skills, it'll probably take dynamite.
Wes
Thanks for sharing the picture of Paul and your day at Six Flags with us. I also think of Paul when I find coins on the ground. Who cares if it is heads up or not, I pick it up and smile.
Still in my prayers,
D. Lightfoot
I'm so glad you're all continuing to make happy memories at Six Flags even though I know it has to be hard with all of the old memories flooding back when you walk through the park. I know you miss him terribly. Our family continues to lift you all up in prayer. You Saxons have inspired so many to go before the Lord in prayer. The impact of Paul's life--especially his 4-year battle with NB is still felt by so many. He was a brave and inspiring little boy, just as you too are brave and inspiring--no matter how weak and helpless you may feel at times. You honor Paul's memory well.
Laura F.
I am sure Paul was watching your every move at Six Flags and smiled everytime you stopped to remember him. Your heartache is his peace. Peace in knowing that you miss and love him. Peace in knowing that you are all trying your best to still live while you are here.
God bless all of you. And thanks to God for your wonderful memories.
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